What Does May Day Mean To You?

When I was in 1st grade, I remember the May Pole dance. It consisted of a big pole with multi-colored streamers attached to the top of the pole. I THINK it was only the girls who participated in this, but I could be mistaken. First grade was a long time ago and my memory seems to fade a little more each day. In any case, the girls (?) went around and around in different directions while weaving in and out. The result was that the streamers ended up braided in an intricate pattern.

Of course Mrs. O'Rourke never told us that the May Pole represented a giant penis and the whole thing was a Pagan fertility festival.

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In high school, the May Day program consisted of the band and chorus regaling everyone with music. This was all presided over by the May Queen and Her Court and culminated in the crowning of the May Queen. My senior year I was honored when Mary Frances Crowe, one of the senior class representatives asked me to be her escort. We danced the box step to "Let Me Call You Sweetheart" as the curtain fell at the end of the program.

Not ironically, this tradition could also be linked to the fertility question, although in high school it's more animalistic than Pagan.

The May Queen of my senior class happened to be pregnant when she was crowned May Queen. Twenty one years prior to this, the May Queen of my mother's senior class was ALSO pregnant when she was crowned May Queen.

Oh, the humanity.

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Today, I celebrate May Day in a different way. It marks one month in which I have not put one single cent into a slot machine. For someone who played machines nearly every day, this is quite an accomplishment for me. It makes quite a difference in the old bank balance, that is for certain. I may play again tomorrow, but I hope not. What I do hope is that after too many years of wasting too much money I have finally come to my senses. I can hear my late grandmother asking me if I didn't work too hard for my money to piss it away in the machines.

Perhaps I do.